the-elm's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Eyes Of Tragedy Hot, angry tears slid down her face as she sat alone in the twilight. She was alone again, like she always was. It was the way she was meant to be. All alone; deserted. Her dreams, they meant nothing to them. Nothing but stupid hopes that would never come true… The sun sank lower and lower, till darkness surrounded her. Darkness within her, and darkness without. Those thoughts returned once again. The same ones she had been battling with for so long. But they would never leave; they always returned like the vulture does to a rotting corpse till it is picked clean. The moon shone a pale, sickly yellow light which made her sallow skin emit an unnatural glow. Her dull, expressionless eyes gained an eerie glint. She was not herself anymore… But who could blame her? With time, even she began to lose sight of her hopes and dreams. And now she was left with nothing. It would be into that very nothingness that she would dissolve, till she was nothing more than a distant, vague memory. Soon the few that knew her would forget her, and it would be as if she was never there. With one hand she wiped her tears away. She would not have anyone see her that way. To the world, she had to appear strong, together, and indifferent. Little did they know of the reality that lay beneath the façade. And every now and then, when it would show beneath the cracks, they would dismiss it as a momentary bout of immaturity. They told her she was meant for greater things… But what they really meant was she was a prisoner to the destiny prescribed to her by them. She would be a prisoner like that forever, and to think that she would ever be free would be foolishness. “I wish them all dead…” she muttered under her breath. But then she changed her mind, “No… I wish I were dead…” Yes, that would be better for her. Much better. Safe from the disappointment, the frustration, the anger, the hatred. But there was nothing she could do about that. Of course, she had tried before. The scars bore witness to that fact. But it was never good enough. Just like everything else that she did. Nothing would ever satisfy her soul. The thirst to break free would never be quenched. It gnawed away inside her, slowly eating away at her sanity. But now there wasn’t much of that left either. She was hollow, empty and jaded. Once upon a time they would act like they cared, like it mattered to them how she felt. But not anymore. The times changed, and with them so did she… A small part of her still hoped that they cared. But she knew the bitter truth, and she was training herself to accept it, the way one would try to coax themselves into swallowing bitter medicine, because in the end, it would do them more good than harm. In the distance the wind rustled in the leaves and shadows moved. She could hear the distant sound of civilization. Civilization, in other words the organized chaos that everyone was so accustomed to. It was time now for her to return to it. Gathering her strength she rose, like a phoenix from the flames. This would be just another cut on her wrist… Just another day in her life, and soon it would be nothing more than just another bitter memory to add to her list. “Time to move on…” she mumbled as her silhouette disappeared into the distance… 10:09 a.m. - 2006-02-26 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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